***WARNING: Sappy moment coming on.***
Christmas is just around the corner and I'm just about the luckiest lady in the world.

I have so much to be grateful for but there is this one void nagging at me as of late. It's been 6 years now that my Mom's been gone. I miss her each and every single day but this being our first Christmas with Ethan...well it just breaks my heart just a little bit more. Christmas was her most favorite day of the year and this one would have had her just bubbling over with pleasure.

It tortured me that she wasn't there to see her Grandson born (although I like to believe she was). And as truly grateful as I am for the people that were there, I would have given anything to have had her there holding my hand.

She won't see Ethan's eyes light up with all his presents, all the fun colors, sounds and excitement of Christmas. She won't see him as we carry on the family tradition of cute Christmas jammies on Christmas morning or see him eye-balling the turkey and other yummies that he just can't have yet. And she'll never get that sweet little smile when she picks him up for a hug or hear him laugh just because he's happy to see her.

I try to stay upbeat and keep telling myself that she'll always be with me, but I'd give anything in this world to have her here with me now. Some days you just have to take a moment to cry.

Merry Christmas, Mom. And thank you for all of the wonderful memories you blessed me with.  ¶ 9:14 AM